The Top 10

Ok. so the past few days have been great, and, at times, i've been irrate or rueful or utterly confused; but, for the most part, there's been a consistent level of happiness permeating the past few days. I've got nothing to really talk about that's any more interesting than anything else, otherwise, i'd speak up. But hey, I've devised a way to tell of my time and still keep it, at best, feigning something intriguing.

***THE_TOP_10***
(OF MY PAST FEW DAYS)

10. I saw my step sister. Yeah, the one who, for a lack of a better term, eloped to escape her mother. She's pregnant... I've always wondered if she was a lady to date. Apparently, she's in the coital dating game. I've always interpreted her--partially because i know her mother, my step mom--as a lady who's into shakespeare's works and anything of prestigious, english value but never sex or guys--besides their pictures as a great decore for her desktop background. Regardless, she's looking vivacious and healthy, and i haven't seen anything particularly disagreeable with her attitude or aptitude for raising a child. I'm actually quite happy she's doing what she thinks is best, regardless of parental contention.
9. Stephanie and I have been in and out of contention, over and over. But there is light at the end of the tunnel. Seeing the facets set out in my mind for perpending, I've contrived many ways of reparation, henceforth, making the situation at least tolerable. There's just too many times where we've become irate over the most trivial things. When we're talking and one of us isn't specifically paying attention in a time in which it's needed, one may get upset that the other isn't listening, but that's all solveable Life has it's ups and downs, and it doesn't only apply to a few areas, rather the whole scheme.
8. I went to my dad's for thanksgiving dinner, and i wasn't accompanied by stephanie becasue she was too pissed off at my dad for not allowing me to go to van wert with her. It's not even that though. See... i can go; it's just that i can't stay over night with her. We were going to put in on a hotel room together and stay with KP and Emily as well. Neglecting to tell her today, i realized we can't rent a room out anyways. You have to be 21 years of age in order to rent a room out. Honestly, who the fuck came up with that rule? Is it a state law, or national, or worldwide OR WHAT!? Anyways, i'm kinda relieved i'm not spending the money. I have a mass amount of shit to spend it on this holiday sesson and little money to get what i need. Thanksgiving sales, here i commA!
7. I skipped school on tuesday. Yeah, i went there. Actually, i went to steph's and hung with her and KP. I do feel pretty bad about it, missing so many days already, and the week was only two days long. Well... shit, monday was a field trip too. Fuck it. I have straight A's so far, higher than A's in some classes--as if it made a difference.
6. After a unique discussion with my physics teacher, i've come to the understanding there's alternative, meretricious motives. Those bastards are only stringent with their attendance rules because money is involved. They get an average of $5000 per student from the state for being a vocational school. The state comes in and takes a snapshot of the attendance--approximately a week's attendance--and they come back at the end of the year to review the attendance records, comparing that single week's average to the entire year's average, creating a difference sum which is then subtracted from the total payment. So they want us to attend their fucking retard school because they get money out of it. It doesn't matter if i can miss tons of days and get good grades. Monetary motives by the educational machine piss me off...
5. Kylee graduated from Wright State in the honor's society. I'm very proud, and she's set a new expectation for the younger siblings in our family. Work hard and it will pay off in due time. it's gone by so fast, all the time. so much has gone by. deaths and births and wow... it's just hard to remember all thats happened. I'm sure this just gets worse with time.
4. Work has been something of a let own for me. I've been working less and less lately. i don't think i can really handle working 4 days a week along with school. It just gets too time consuming and there's never time for me to be alone to even write a blog entry or do anything intriguing to me. At least i have a job that pays and there's not a horrible problem with money.
3-1. Sleep... i must get sleep... I'll finish 3-1 later. you get what i can give, and that's all...
Love you guys!

oh i'll do it later

Well it's gotten to be that time of year again, that time of day, where i should sleep. But isn't there so much more to do? So much more to be done. I guess Stephanie's right, when i'm in a bad mood, there's nothing that i'll really like to do anyways. Still... that doesn't make me feel any better now, and, being the homegrown american i am, I'd rather get a quick fix then ever solve the problem at large. So, sleep? The real question at hand, and will i sleep before i further the ruination of my mood? ehhh... I'll sleep later, when i get off work or something. I'd rather try and feel better now, even though things seem bleak. I'm not feeling so much rueful as irratable right now, leaving me with a nasty taste in my mouth, which reminds me, i need to brush my teeth. I don't have a toothbrush here at my moms. I'll do it later. I've got physics homework. I wanted to talk to kara about getting hooked up on here cellphone plan. I need to get more details on my sister's graduation ceremony and relay all that information to Stephanie and collaborate. I should be talking to my friends more, but i don't know what to say; and now is not the time for cheerful, spontaneous banter. Nevertheless, i've called max, talked about some band stuff as usual and told him i'd call and we'd hangout sometime. But with all that said, and all that on mind, i must come to some conclusion as to what i'll do.
I'll do it later.

build up so high, to fall so far

I don't want to sound melodramatic, but i've been spiralling down for the past two days. I'm on break from Arby's, and, as of now, i'm not feeling too horrible. I'd rather not think of tomorrow and what it brings. I've been home most of today, except for going to see stephanie at waffle house. I'd love to see her again tonight, but she's got things to be doing, photography class emails, school work, arby's and more. I don't want her to worry about me, and, when i do come over and cry around her, it makes me feel even worse for doing it around her. It's on her mind, and that's just more for me to feel bad about. Things are seemingly picking up, slowly but surely. I've hit the bottom, rock bottom, and picking yourself up isn't something too easily done.
I miss and love you stephanie. You do help, just listening to me.
I have to go back to arby's now. Hopefully, everything will work out fine in the end.
Love to all who read my blog, i appreciate much, especially in times like this.

I Think I Can Pencil You In

It's been a good weekend, and i have only but a few regrets. Regrets are for yourself only. Anyways, It's been quite a good weekend, and, from the beginning alone, i was happy to just not be working. I've spent a good deal of time with Stephanie. The times have been balanced coital at times, but I know it wasn't too coital, because i only get to see her a couple of days a week now with my work schedule. I work all week and don't get to see my beloved, subsequently, a coital weekend arises. Simple cause and effect. We've been saying to each other, "we had great sex last night", which couldn't be more true. I don't want to make the other times we've engaged in intimacy seem less valuable--because that's ingenuously not true--but, we're both agreed, that was up there in the top ten for sure. I'm speaking of Friday night, of course. For people that shouldn't know this information...Ignore the past few sentences. They never happened...comprehend?
Stephanie, i have one qeustion. Why did you mention marrage in your last entry? You're so cute. You have such a feminine mind, but i'm not saying that's over the top or that's bad--it's simply taken as cute.
Work is consuming my time, not too mention that it's too far away. Mon.-Thurs. 4-11 P.M.
I want to get something together with michelle and david, starting a jam group, just to have fun, but, with all this work amoungst my fucking days, i don't know where that's going to be penciled in. When the extent of your free time is limited to Friday and Saturday and between times on Sunday, you really have to start a fucking planner, but i'm too good for planners... ^_^ Fucking sick of all this work and people always complaining.
"these little kids working don't do shit."-Robert
"Oh! That explains why you're sitting in the office playing poker, while I'm taking orders and doing close, subsuquent to preclose!"
Fucking morons! I work harder than half the people working at my Arby's, but that will all change here soon, because I'm getting a different job, closer to home, spending less gas money to get there and back from, and that isn't in the food business, hopefully. -crosses fingers- All while making more per hour, with less physical work.
That's what's on my mind at the moment. Peace and Love Folks!

lost my dream in the transition

I woke up this morning with a sore throat and a fairly clogged, stuffy throat. It wasn't anything anyone would want to awaken to, shivering from the cold and a runny nose pouring out mandy and her pee. Speaking of mandy's pee, it's like a mine field downstairs with that shit, if you don't have adequate protection, aka a good pair of shoes, you're in for a good foot washing.

I've been attending school, only because i have a lawful gun to my "lawless" head. Sons of bitches. My English teacher is being quite cocky about all this ruckus, turning up the mud sediment and egocentric questions. Rhetorical as they may be, the pretentious bastard's not getting respect from me anymore. He didn't need to hold me up to the flames... Seared in the hate, all that was accomplished. More power, fuckwad.

I'm taking stetny (stet-knee) (a.k.a. Stephanie) out to Olive Garden this weekend. I better be getting some recompense, a kiss maybe. Hopefully on the lips this time, it'll be our first. I mean, the food there isn't just palatable, it's worth an entire makeout session, but I'll settle for a frenchie with a "happy ending", lol. I'm just teasing Steph, don't freak out and think i'm some Super asshole boyfriend... You know i'm poking fun at your QT butt, gurl.

It'll be fun to take her out for a real date, where i actually get to pay--can't believe i said that--for her meal, especially, since she hasn't eaten at OG before. I'd like to go on a real double date with david and jessica sometime. I had a good time when we hung around david's watching As Good As It Gets. I'd like to do that again. I think Stetny liked Jessica--they seemed to play well together. (pokes more fun at the kitty queen) I mean, give them a ball of yarn, and they'll be busy for a while. haha--teasing, sorry, couldn't resist. "women and their attitudes."
But i love my queen more than anything.
I'm going to try to sleep to pass the time in lab, sitting for another hour and half doesn't seem too fun. Love ya guys, Peace!